I had my first emotional breakdown earlier this week. I have been containing all of my emotions for so long because I just don't know what emotion is going to win out. I am overwhelmed, nervous, anxious, sad, frustrated, happy, excited and all around scared for the upcoming move and wedding. It is crazy and strange to feel all of those emotions at once but its true. At any moment I can be anxious, excited and sad all at once. On Monday sad and overwhelmed won the race and I just burst into tears. The financial burden of buying a house is finally hitting me, the fact that I don't even know how to begin packing up 23 years of things to take to my house in Indiana while I will still be living in Michigan is stressful and I am sad to be leaving my home, my friends, my family, my next door neighbors and everything that I have known here in Detroit for my entire life!
This isn't meant to be depressing. I am excited to own my own house. I am excited to go on new adventures, to meet new people and get to know a new town. I am excited to be free from my parents home. I can't wait until Phil and I get to see eachother every day instead of once a month. I can't wait to start my job at Purdue and meet people their. I can't wait to teach bible school for the younger kids at Elmwood. I can't wait to join the 20 somethings group and get to know a group of people that are amazing people of God. I can't wait to spend more time with the Sutherlins and have girls nights scrapbooking in my craft room. All of these excitements are also playing out in my head.
So now I have 4 days until I leave for Indiana to clean our house and finally become homeowners. From now until then I have to pack up my things that I won't need from now until the wedding. A daunting task but now after writing this... I am energized and ready to pack.
Thanks for listening :)